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Fatherhood, Co-Parenting and Child Support information. Get a better of understanding of your rights as a parent before you go to court. We will also give you information on how to be a better father and co-parent with the mother. Our goal is to increase father's involvement in the family structure.

Men's attitude to fatherhood influences child behavior, says study

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Men's attitude to fatherhood influences child behavior, says study

Nicola Davis, TheGuardian.com

Preteen behavioral problems less likely in children with confident fathers who embrace parenthood, suggest researchers



Children of confident fathers who embrace parenthood are less likely to show behavioral problems before their teenage years, researchers have found.
A new study suggests that a man’s attitudes towards fatherhood soon after his child’s birth, as well as his feelings of security as a father and partner, are more important than his involvement in childcare and household chores when it came to influencing a child’s later behavior.
“It is the emotional connection and the emotional response to actually being a parent that matters enormously in relation to later outcomes for children,” said Maggie Redshaw, a developmental and health psychologist at the University of Oxford and co-author of the research.

Writing in the journal BMJ Open, Redshaw and colleagues at the University of Oxford describe how they explored the influence of fathers on the behavior of their offspring by analyzing data from the Avon longitudinal study of parents and children – a large-scale UK study that followed the health and development of thousands of children born in the early 1990s.

The study asked parents to complete questionnaires at various points in their child’s life. Among the surveys, mothers were asked to assess their child’s behavior at nine and 11 years, with questions probing a variety of issues including the child’s attitudes towards other children, their tendency to restlessness, whether they were willing to share toys and their confidence in unfamiliar situations.

Fathers, meanwhile, were asked to complete questionnaires on their approach and feelings towards parenting both eight weeks and eight months after their child’s birth, with questions including how often they helped with housework, how confident they felt as a parent, and whether they enjoyed spending time with the baby. Answers were given on scales, and then totted up.
Looking at the results for more than 6,300 children who lived with both parents at least until eight months old, the researchers found that children whose fathers were more confident about being a parent, and who were more emotionally positive about the role, were less likely to show behavioral difficulties by the ages of nine and 11. By contrast, the degree to which a father engaged with chores around the home or activities with their child apparently had no such influence.

Examining the fathers’ scores for emotional responses to their babies, taking into account factors such as the child’s gender, family size and socioeconomic status, it was found that for every point the scores increased above the average, the relative chance of the child having signs of behavioral problems decreased by 14%, and 11% at ages nine and 11 respectively. Similarly, for every point increase beyond the average in the fathers’ sense of security in parenting, the relative likelihoods of the child having behavioral problems were 13%, and 11% lower by ages nine and 11, respectively.
While the authors admit that study relied on self-reporting, and that attitudes to parenting might have changed over the years, Redshaw says the work highlights the impact of how parents feel about their roles on child development. “It is part of the approach that early experience matters and it matters from the point of view of both parents,” she said.

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Dads Are Magic Too. [Video]

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Thursday, March 16, 2017

Dads Are Magic Too.

Posted by Melissa Steward

Trusted legacy brand, Baby Magic, has partnered with National Fatherhood Initiative® (NFI) to launch a campaign “Dads Are Magic Too”, which puts a spotlight on influential dads across the world that are changing the way society looks at fatherhood.

For years, dads have often been known as the “passive parent,” but research shows that modern dads are more involved in their families’ lives more than ever before. In honor of these amazing role models, Baby Magic, the makers of Baby Magic products alongside parent company Naterra, have made a commitment to highlight real dads of all kinds – single dads, stay-at-home dads, dads working alongside moms – to help dads everywhere realize that they have a lot more to offer.



The partnership will support NFI’s commitment to teaching more men the importance of fatherhood, and uplifting those who may not have had a strong father figure themselves. To that end, Baby Magic will make a monetary donation to help sustain NFI’s key initiatives, and will also promote NFI’s work on many platforms.

“Baby Magic was inspired to launch the ‘Dads Are Magic Too’ campaign after observing the way that fathers all over the world are stepping up more than ever to become irreplaceable forces in their children’s’ lives and are working together with mothers to raise little ones,” said Baby Magic Director of Marketing, Laurie Enright. “In conjunction with our new campaign, we’re thrilled to be able to partner with National Fatherhood Initiative to raise awareness around the importance of fathers engaging in their children’s lives, while encouraging people across the globe to support this great cause and show love to wonderful fathers everywhere.”


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4 Reasons to Promote Marriage to Dads

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Tuesday, February 28, 2017

4 Reasons to Promote Marriage to Dads

Posted by Christopher A. Brown from National Fatherhood Initiative

Dads' self-interest.
Did you think I'd say because it's in the best interest of children? And besides, that's just one reason, isn't it?
There's no doubt that growing up with married parents provides benefits to children. That's a vital reason indeed to promote marriage to dads.
But let's face it. Humans are motivated by self-interest. So it's important to appeal to dads' self-interest when it comes to marriage.
Here's the good news in that regard. Marriage is great for men! A recent brief from the Institute for Family Studies highlights marriage's benefits for men and, consequently, dads. Specifically, compared to single men, married men realize the following four benefits. They:

  • Make more money--about $16,000 a year, to be exact. Marriage increases men's earning power.
  • Have better sex--quality sex, that is. While married men might not have sex as often as, say, cohabiting men, the quality of the sex is superior.
  • Have better physical and emotional health. Compared to singles, married couples do a better job dealing with sickness, monitoring health, and adopting healthier lifestyles.

  • So if marriage is so great for men, why have we seen a decline in the rate of marriage? Massive culture change that's not in men's best interest (or their children's).


    I've seen this change play out in the reactions of some facilitators to the marriage content in National Fatherhood Initiative® (NFI) programs. (NFI's 24/7 Dad® and InsideOut Dad® programs cover the benefits of marriage for men and their children.) One facilitator of a NFI program I interviewed, for example, simply doesn't include that content in the delivery of the program. When I asked why, the facilitator pointed to four reasons:

  • Marriage isn't important to dads.
  • Dads are scared of it.
  • Marriage isn't common in their communities.
  • Fear that dads will stop participating in the program if the facilitator addressed marriage.
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    The Father Absence Crisis [Infographic]

    Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Thursday, February 16, 2017

    The Father Absence Crisis [Infographic]

    Research shows when a child grows up in a father-absent home, he or she is...

    Posted by Melissa Steward from the National Fatherhood Initiative


    The good news is, we can all help. How? By focusing on creating generations of responsible, involved fathers. Whether you are with an organization that serves fathers and families, or you are a father yourself, it's important to carry the message of the value of fathers to our nation.
    To help you share this message, we created a simple yet powerful infographic outlining the father absence crisis in America, and how it's affecting our children.
    Won't you take this to heart and help promote responsible fatherhood? The children of our future will thank you.

     (You can find even more data and statistics here in Father Facts 7.)

    Research shows when a child grows up in a father-absent home, he or she is...

    • 1) Four Times More Likely to Live in Poverty: Children in father-absent homes are almost four times more likely to be poor. (U.S. Census Bureau)
    • 2) More Likely to Suffer Emotional and Behavioral Problems: Children of single mothers show higher levels of aggressive behavior than children born to married mothers. (Journal of Marriage and Family)
    • 3) Two Times Greater Risk of Infant Mortality: Infant mortality rates are nearly two times higher for infants of unmarried mothers than for married mothers. (National Center for Health Statistics)
    • 4) More Likely to go to Prison: One in five prison inmates had a father in prison. (Department of Justice, Office of Justice Programs)
    • 5) More Likely to Commit Crime: Study of juvenile offenders indicated that family structure significantly predicts delinquency. (Journal of Youth and Adolescence)
    • 6) Seven Times More Likely to Become Pregnant as a Teen: Teens without fathers are twice as likely to be involved in early sexual activity and seven times more likely to get pregnant as an adolescent. (Child Development Journal)
    • 7) More Likely to Face Abuse and Neglect: Compared to children living with married biological parents, those whose single parent had a live-in partner had more than 8 times the rate of maltreatment overall, over 10 times the rate of abuse and more than 6 times the rate of neglect. (Child's Bureau)

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    Things I Wish He Knew - Our Letters of Truth: Fathers to Sons & Sons to Fathers

    Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Tuesday, February 07, 2017

    Things I Wish He Knew

    Our Letters of Truth: Fathers to Sons & Sons to Fathers

    by J. Wright Middleton (Author), Daniel Middleton (Author), Keenon Mann (Contributor), Marquan Newman (Contributor), PerduInk . (Contributor), Herb Middleton (Contributor), Donte Skinner (Contributor), Josh Minor(Contributor), Gregory Jones (Contributor), Akin - (Contributor), Meqai Herder (Contributor), Marc Antoine (Contributor), Kelvin Lesene Jr (Contributor)


    The bond between a father and son is very important and for many reasons that bond or lack thereof can be the greatest thing in life or the most devastating. "Things I Wish He Knew" Our Letters of Truth From A Male Perspective is a compilation book of letters written from fathers to their sons & vice versa. The purpose of this book is to allow men a platform to step out from the shadows of hidden unspoken words and speak directly or indirectly to their father and/or son. It may be something they've never got the chance to say, are too afraid to say or don't know how to say. I wanted to provide an opportunity for all men to shed light and give voice of praise, appreciation, hurt, disappointment, wisdom or instruction.

    DFFC Kent County President Keenon Mann, academic advisor of the Georgetown campus, is a contributing author to "Things I Wish He Knew: Our Letters of Truth," a compilation of personal letters written from fathers to their sons and vice versa.


    For more, check it out on Amazon at Congratulations, Keenon!

    4 New eBooks to Help You Serve Fathers

    Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Tuesday, January 24, 2017

    It doesn't matter what setting you're looking to serve fathers in, we can help you. Take a look at our new eBooks to help you not only get started but succeed at serving fathers. 

    comm-based-org-persona-ebook.jpg1) Community-Based Organizations > 
    The Benefits of Fatherhood Programs in Community-Based Organizations


    We understand there are many challenges faced by fathers in America. Thankfully, there are community-based organizations who care about fathers and are interested in connecting fathers to their families.

    Here's what you, the community-based leader, can expect from this helpful eBook: 

    • What Fathers Need from Community-Based Organizations
    • Parenting Interventions and Community-Based Organizations
    • 8 Issues Fatherhood Programs Help You Address
    • Community-Based Organizations Having Success with Fatherhood
    • 24/7 Dad® Wrap Around Services
    • Spotlight on one Community-Based Organization who's doing things right

    download ebook






    corrections-persona-ebook.jpg2) Corrections and Reentry > 
    The Power of Fatherhood Education in Corrections and Reentry

    There are 2.7 million children with a parent in prison or jail. Ninety-two percent (92%) of parents in prison are fathers. Incarceration makes a significant contribution to father absence. Indeed, it is a cause of father absence. 

    How can this eBook help you serve fathers in corrections and reentry settings?

    Here's what you'll find for working with incarcerated and/or formerly incarcerated fathers in this new eBook:

    • The Problem for America's Children
    • The Case for Fatherhood in Corrections and Reentry
    • How to Rehabilitate
       and Address Criminogenic Needs
    • How to Maintain Facility Safety and Order
    • Planning for Reentry
    • Reducing Recidivism
    • The Solution for America's Children
    • Evidence-Based Fatherhood Programming
    • Creating Sustainable Programs
    • Programs in Jails and Short-Term Stay Facilities
    • InsideOut Dad® Testimonials

    download ebook



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    What You Need to Know - New Rule to Increase Regular Child Support Payments

    Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Saturday, January 07, 2017

    What You Need to Know

    New Rule to Increase Regular Child Support Payments

    Posted by Christopher A. Brown

    Many of the noncustodial dads served by organizations and programs like yours struggle to pay child support.

    The ability of fathers to pay child support has been an issue in sore need of addressing at the federal and state levels for many years. After all, if a father can’t afford to pay the child support he owes, it has bad consequences for him, his child, and the mother or guardian of his child.

    What You Need to Know > New Rule to Increase Regular Child Support Payments.jpg

    That’s why a new rule issued by the Administration for Children and Families (ACF)—the federal agency responsible for child support enforcement and partnering with state, tribal, and local child support agencies—has the potential to positively transform the collection of child support across the country. Although some important provisions didn't make it into the final rule that advocates, including National Fatherhood Initiative, say would have made the rule even more transformative, everyone with a stake in creating effective child support enforcement should be optimistic about its potential.

    Specifically, according to ACF, this new rule will make state child support enforcement programs more effective, flexible, and family-friendly. It requires state child support agencies to increase their case investigative efforts to ensure that child support orders—the amount noncustodial parents are required to pay each month—reflect the parent’s ability to pay.

    The goal of this new rule is to set realistic orders so that noncustodial parents pay regularly, rather than setting an unrealistically high order that results in higher rates of nonpayment. Mark Greenberg, HHS Assistant Secretary for Children and Families, had this to say of the new rule:

    “We know from research that when child support orders are set unrealistically high, noncustodial parents are less likely to pay. In fact, several studies say compliance declines when parents are ordered to pay above 15 to 20 percent of their income.”

    and “By ensuring states set their orders based on actual circumstances in the family, we believe the rule will result in more reliable child support payments, and children will benefit.”


    The new rule updates the child support program by amending existing policy. Here are a few highlights of the new rule:

    • ensure child support obligations are based upon accurate information and the noncustodial parents’ ability to pay
    • increase consistent timely payments to families as well as the number of noncustodial parents supporting their children
    • strengthen procedural fairness
    • improve child support collection rates
    • reduce the accumulation of unpaid and uncollectible child support arrearages
    • incorporate evidence-based standards tested by states that support good customer service
    • increase program efficiency and simplify operational requirements, including standardizing and streamlining payment processing so employers are not unduly burdened
    • incorporate technological advances that support cost-effective management practices and streamlined intergovernmental enforcement
    • prohibit states from excluding incarceration from consideration as a substantial change in circumstances, require states to notify parents of their right to request a review and adjustment of their order if they will be incarcerated for more than six months, and ensure that child support orders for those who are incarcerated reflect the individuals’ circumstances while continuing to allow states significant flexibility in setting orders for incarcerated parents
    • require state child support agencies to make payments directly to a resident parent, legal guardian, or individual designated by the court in order to reign in aggressive and often inappropriate practices of third-party child support collection agencies

    Read the rest of article

    Strengthening Families and The 5 Protective Factors Series: Concrete Support

    Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Friday, December 30, 2016

    Strengthening Families and The 5 Protective Factors Series:

    Concrete Support

    Posted by Christopher A. Brown


    Concrete Support in Times of Need

    About concrete support CSSP emphasizes, “Meeting basic economic needs like food, shelter, clothing and health care is essential for families to thrive.”

    Father-specific programs and resources are necessary to adequately address this factor because fathers, and men in general, are reluctant to seek help for their basic needs, much less to admit they have them. As noted in an earlier post in this series, Doctor Dad® helps fathers meet the basic health care needs necessary for their children to thrive and through teaching techniques that are particularly effective with men (e.g. hands-on learning and demonstration supported by visual aids).

    CSSP points out that family poverty is the factor most strongly correlated with child abuse and neglect. Families need concrete support to prevent them from or lift them out of poverty. Research shows that father absence places children and families at greater risk of poverty. Therefore, any effort addresses this factor when that effort connects fathers with their children to prevent and intervene on father absence.

    NFI recognizes, however, that meeting the basic needs of families (especially those at risk for or living in poverty) is beyond the scope of father-specific programs and resources. Therefore, NFI provides technical assistance and training to help organizations understand the basic needs faced by specific populations of fathers and the importance of integrating father-involvement efforts into the services organizations provide that help families meet their basic economic needs.

    Incarcerated fathers are one of the specific populations of fathers NFI helps organizations to serve, primarily through the InsideOut Dad® program. These fathers often struggle with meeting their own and their families’ basic economic needs before and after incarceration.

    In 2010, NFI completed The Connections Project, an 18-month federally-funded initiative that involved training on InsideOut Dad® and produced several resources that build the capacity of state and local corrections systems and direct-service providers to better understand the basic needs of formerly-incarcerated fathers for successful reentry into society.....

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    The importance of fathers video

    Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Monday, December 26, 2016

    The importance of fathers featuring Correctional Officer Calvin Williams

    TEDx Ironwood State Prison

    Published on Jun 2, 2014

    Single father of 3 children, Correctional Officer Calvin Williams of Ironwood State Prison speaks about the importance of being a father.

    A powerful five-minute video of correctional officer Calvin Williams speaking at a TEDx event held inside a prison about the importance of fathers. What the National Fatherhood Initiative found compelling about the video is not only Calvin's message about how important his role is as a father but the imagery of him delivering the message in his uniform and in a prison.
    The imagery creates a stark contrast between the important, positive message Calvin delivers and the view many people have of correctional officers as tough, demanding, and harsh.

    12 Tips for Live-Away Dads

    Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Friday, December 18, 2015

     

    12 Tips for Live-Away Dads

    Learn more about healthy fathering at www.TheDadMan.com.

    Whether through divorce, deployment or frequent travel, some dads (and some moms, too) live away from their children for long periods. But that does NOT prevent a vibrant, loving, lasting relationship. (Pronouns alternate between daughter and son.)

    1. HANG IN THERE FOR THE LONG HAUL. Living away while raising a child is tough, but both his mom and I remain ‚Äčtremendous influences in his life. I meet my responsibilities, including child support, without resentment. I stay calm, committed, loving and loyal toward him -- and do what I can to help his mom do the same. If abuse or abandonment happen, my child needs me to protect him, but he also needs to make peace in his life with that relationship.

     

    2. ENCOURAGE HER BOND WITH MOM. My child's relationship with her mom is different than her relationship with me. My child needs to participate fully in it, even when that's hard for me (or her). I encourage her communication with her mom, recognizing that I'm not responsible for their relationship.

     

    3. DEVELOP HEALTHY SOCIAL AND EMOTIONAL SUPPORTS FOR MYSELF. It's normal to struggle with anger, loneliness and other difficult emotions. I meet my adult emotional and social needs maturely with healthy adults; I don't work them out through my child.

     

    4. REMEMBER THAT MY CHILD LIVES IN TWO HOMES. The hours before he leaves my home and after he returns may be times of adjustment and sadness that he has to leave either parent "behind." I respect that he may or may not want to talk right away about his time with his mom; I let him take the lead. I don't pry for information or play down his feelings.

     

    5. FATHER THE BEST I CAN WHEN MY CHILD IS WITH ME. I can't change how her other parent(s) raise her and I can't make up for what they do or don't do, so I focus on what I can control: my own actions. I don't judge their parenting because no one (including me) is a perfect parent. I trust that all of us are trying our best. I parent her calmly; have clear expectations; show affection, patience, love and trust -- without demanding perfection. I give her healthy attention when she's with me and when she's away (by phone, text, mail, etc.).

     

    6. DON'T TRASH MOM. In word and gesture, I speak well about my child's mom even when I'm angry at her -- and even if she speaks poorly about me. If I have trouble speaking well, I wisely say little. Negative talk about my child's mom humiliates and wounds my child, causing him to think less of himself, his mom and me. I keep him out of the middle, even if others don't, and I'll resolve adult conflicts away from him so he can be the child.

     

    7. CO-PARENT WITH MOM. If possible, I communicate openly with her mom. As our child grows up, other parents' perspectives are valuable -- and a real bonus for our child. We work with each other (and our partners) for our child's well-being. When I share my concerns and joys about our child with her mom (and vice versa), our child gets our best and most informed parenting.

     

    8. MY CHILD AND HIS MOTHER ARE DIFFERENT PEOPLE. I don't misdirect anger at my ex toward my child. When my child doesn't listen, does less than his best or makes mistakes (normal kid behaviors), I don't confuse his mistakes with his mom's actions. Instead, I remember that mistakes are great teachers, and do what I can do to help him learn from his mistakes -- and mine.

     

    9. LISTEN TO MY CHILD. Lecturing and arguing get me nowhere. I can't help my child if I minimize her feelings or tell her everything will be okay when I can't guarantee that it will. Instead, I listen and am there for her. I accept my child for who she is; not who I want her to be, think she should be, or think she would be if she were raised only by me. I take the lead in communicating -- even when I feel unappreciated -- building the emotional connection that will help her listen to me when it really counts.

     

    10. FOCUS ON MY CHILD'S POSITIVES. I don't father by always pointing out what my child did wrong, so he can fix it. That may work on the job, but not with my children. Focusing on negatives undermines his strength and confidence -- already stretched by living in two homes.

     

    11. MANAGE EXPECTATIONS WISELY.My child has different rules and expectations in her mother's house. I am patient with her responses to those differences, while remaining clear about my expectations for our home. I try not to compensate for our family situation by giving in to demands that I spoil my child or lessen my expectations just because she is a child of divorce. I remember that an honest, solid and lifelong relationship with her is more important than what happens today.

     

    12. BE THE FATHER, NOT THE MOTHER. I am a powerful and encouraging role model, and I tell him he has a special place in my heart. My masculine actions and loving words help him realize that he too can be adventurous, affectionate, playful and successful -- and should expect respect from other honorable men. My belief in him will help him blossom into a young adult who can make me and her mother proud.


    About DFFC

    The Delaware Fatherhood & Family Coalition is an extension of the Promoting Safe and Stable Families Program and the Responsible Fatherhood Initiative created specifically to give a voice to fathers and the importance of their involvement for the well-being of their children.


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