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Fatherhood, Co-Parenting and Child Support information. Get a better of understanding of your rights as a parent before you go to court. We will also give you information on how to be a better father and co-parent with the mother. Our goal is to increase father's involvement in the family structure.

The Problem of Incarceration for America's Children

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Monday, April 03, 2017

The Problem of Incarceration for America's Children

Posted by Melissa Steward from National Fatherhood Initiative


There are 2.7 million children with a parent in prison or jail. Ninety-two percent (92%) of parents in prison are fathers.

The sort-of good news is that ninety-five (95%) of all inmates will eventually be released. The not-so-good news is that most—2 out of 3 inmates—will re-offend and be back in prison.
It's clear we have a problem. But we also have a solution.
When we talk about father absence in general, we focus on the U.S. Census Bureau's statistic that 24 million children—one out of three—live without their dad in the home. Consequently, there is a “father factor” in nearly all of the societal issues facing America today.

We must take action to raise up more involved, responsible, and committed fathers. And that includes fathers who are currently (or formerly) incarcerated.
To help you better understand and share this message, we created a simple yet powerful infographic outlining the problem and solution for America's children due to fathers behind bars.

The Facts [The Problem for America's Children]

There are 2.7 million children with a parent in prison or jail.  
The number of children with a father in prison has grown by 79% since 1991.
Having a parent who is incarcerated is now recognized as an “adverse childhood experience” (ACE). This is different from other ACEs because of the trauma, stigma, and shame it inflicts on children.
More than 650,000 ex-offenders are released from prison every year. Fathers are returning to their children and families without the skills they need to be involved, responsible, and committed fathers.
Incarceration often spans generations. Fathers in prison are, overwhelmingly, fatherless themselves. Youths in father-absent households have significantly higher odds of incarceration.
Two-thirds of released prisoners, or 429,000, are likely to be rearrested within three years. Recidivism is a huge, national problem, and fathers are leaving their children behind.


The Solution for America's Children


Give incarcerated fathers a vision that they have a unique and irreplaceable role in the life of their child. Increased confidence, along with changes in attitude and skills are a powerful motivator for successful reentry and to bring home fathers to their children.

Use an evidence-based program to rehabilitate fathers and train men on what it means to be a man and a father. NFI's InsideOut Dad® program is the only evidence-based parenting program designed specifically for incarcerated fathers. An evaluation conducted by Rutger's University found that fathers who went through InsideOut Dad® while in prison showed statistically significant increases in fathering knowledge and confidence/self-esteem compared to a control group.

Connect fathers with their children heart-to-heart. Through activities and group sessions in a program like InsideOut Dad®, fathers take action to reach out to their children to begin, repair, or rejuvenate relationships with their children and families.

Help to reduce recidivism, especially for fathers. Fathers who are involved with, and connected to their children and families prior to release are less likely to return to jail or prison. In fact, some states have conducted evaluations that connect the use of NFI's InsideOut Dad® program along with other interventions to reduce recidivism.


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How To Involve Dad During & After Mom's Pregnancy

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Monday, March 13, 2017

How To Involve Dad During & After Mom's Pregnancy

Posted by Melissa Steward

Children do much better physically and emotionally when dad is involved right from the start. In fact, dad's physical presence at the birth of his child increases the likelihood his child will be a healthy newborn. It also means mom is likely to be healthier. On the other hand, when dad is absent, baby and mom are less likely to be healthy.

But what about after the child’s birth? How involved is dad at the earliest stage of his child's life? These are two vital questions, because based on research, a child with an involved dad is more likely to grow up healthy physically, emotionally, and socially.

The children of absent dads are more likely to have a range of health complications and low birth weight. And moms are more likely to have had complications during pregnancy.

Research shows when a child grows up in a father-absent home, he or she is at two times greater risk of infant mortality, four times more likely to live in poverty, more likely to face abuse and neglect, and seven times more likely to become pregnant as a teen. And unfortunately, there’s more to this list; view more father absence data at www.fatherhood.org/statistics.

Based on the above, it’s important that your organization and staff take this research to heart and do everything you can to involve fathers right from the start.

Here are a few ways you can leverage National Fatherhood Initiative resources to do just that:

Share the above information with dads and moms from the moment you learn they want to have children or a pregnancy is confirmed.
NFI’s Importance of an Involved Father Brochure is one of our newest resources to help you share this information in a simple and easy-to-understand way with mom and dad.
Another is our Tip Card for moms titled For Baby’s Health, which helps mom understand the importance and benefits of dad’s involvement for the health of their baby.

Before baby is born, provide dads with training on how to be a great dad. NFI's 24/7 Dad®programs and The 7 Habits of a 24/7 Dad™ workshop are excellent tools to use.
You can also give dads 10 Tips for Expectant Dads to provide expectant fathers with tips to help dad bond with baby, while helping mom-to-be.

Before baby is born, provide moms with training on the importance of encouraging dad's involvement, and how to become a “gateway” to his involvement rather than a “gatekeeper”.

NFI's Understanding Dad™8-week program and Mom as Gateway™ FatherTopics Booster Session (run in 1-day or a few shorter sessions) are excellent tools to use. The Importance of an Involved Father Brochure is also excellent to give to moms In fact, it also contains a short list of ways mom can encourage dad’s involvement.


READ MORE INFO:

The Father Absence Crisis [Infographic]

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Thursday, February 16, 2017

The Father Absence Crisis [Infographic]

Research shows when a child grows up in a father-absent home, he or she is...

Posted by Melissa Steward from the National Fatherhood Initiative


The good news is, we can all help. How? By focusing on creating generations of responsible, involved fathers. Whether you are with an organization that serves fathers and families, or you are a father yourself, it's important to carry the message of the value of fathers to our nation.
To help you share this message, we created a simple yet powerful infographic outlining the father absence crisis in America, and how it's affecting our children.
Won't you take this to heart and help promote responsible fatherhood? The children of our future will thank you.

 (You can find even more data and statistics here in Father Facts 7.)

Research shows when a child grows up in a father-absent home, he or she is...

  • 1) Four Times More Likely to Live in Poverty: Children in father-absent homes are almost four times more likely to be poor. (U.S. Census Bureau)
  • 2) More Likely to Suffer Emotional and Behavioral Problems: Children of single mothers show higher levels of aggressive behavior than children born to married mothers. (Journal of Marriage and Family)
  • 3) Two Times Greater Risk of Infant Mortality: Infant mortality rates are nearly two times higher for infants of unmarried mothers than for married mothers. (National Center for Health Statistics)
  • 4) More Likely to go to Prison: One in five prison inmates had a father in prison. (Department of Justice, Office of Justice Programs)
  • 5) More Likely to Commit Crime: Study of juvenile offenders indicated that family structure significantly predicts delinquency. (Journal of Youth and Adolescence)
  • 6) Seven Times More Likely to Become Pregnant as a Teen: Teens without fathers are twice as likely to be involved in early sexual activity and seven times more likely to get pregnant as an adolescent. (Child Development Journal)
  • 7) More Likely to Face Abuse and Neglect: Compared to children living with married biological parents, those whose single parent had a live-in partner had more than 8 times the rate of maltreatment overall, over 10 times the rate of abuse and more than 6 times the rate of neglect. (Child's Bureau)

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Family Tips

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Tuesday, December 27, 2016

Family Tips

EXECUTIVE SUMMARY - BY LAURA H. LIPPMAN & W. BRADFORD WILCOX

The family is the core institution for child-rearing worldwide, and decades of research have shown that strong families promote positive child outcomes. For this reason the World Family Map Project monitors family well-being and investigates how family characteristics affect children’s healthy development around the globe. Families do not operate in a vacuum: their ability to provide for their children and supervise their development depends not only on parenting behaviors and attitudes but also on the social, economic, and policy environments that surround them. Yet efforts to strengthen families are often considered off-limits or of low priority for policy and programmatic interventions, especially in times of financial strain. With the indicators and analyses presented here, this project points individuals, families, communities, NGOs, and governments to some key factors affecting child and family well-being that policies and programs can shape in order to foster strong families and positive outcomes for children.‚Äč

 

Learn More: https://worldfamilymap.org

Strengthening Families and The 5 Protective Factors Series: Parental Resilience

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Sunday, December 18, 2016

Strengthening Families and The 5 Protective Factors Series:

Parental Resilience

Posted by Christopher A. Brown


Strengthening Families™ is a research-informed approach to increase family strengths, enhance child development, and reduce the likelihood of child abuse and neglect. It is based on engaging families, programs, and communities in building five protective factors:

  • Parental resilience
  • Social connections
  • Knowledge of parenting and child development
  • Concrete support in times of need
  • Social and emotional competence of children

Using the Strengthening Families™ framework, more than 30 states are shifting policy and practice to help programs working with children and families focus on protective factors. States apply the Strengthening Families approach in early childhood, child welfare, child abuse prevention, and other child and family serving systems.


Each post includes more detail on each factor than in the brief.

Parental Resilience

Parental resilience is defined by CSSP as “The ability to manage and bounce back from all types of challenges that emerge in every family’s life. It means finding ways to solve problems, building and sustaining trusting relationships including relationships with your own child, and knowing how to seek help when necessary.”

Key to building this resilience is addressing parents’ individual developmental history, psychological resources, and capacity to empathize with self and others. Programs and resources that rely on Attachment Theory create the pro-social connections necessary to develop parental resilience. Because so many parents who abuse and neglect children were abused and neglected themselves, they became parents void of quality intimate relationships with their own parents or caregivers. These parents find it difficult to develop positive attachments to their own children.

Father-specific resources address this factor because fathers who abuse and neglect their children, or who are at risk to abuse and neglect, have unique developmental needs compared to mothers. They moved through a different developmental trajectory. Because many of these fathers lacked involved fathers or positive male role models, they did not develop positive attachments to their fathers and other men. They also did not develop pro-fathering attitudes and values, chief among them attitudes and values associated with healthy masculinity. Masculinity is the primary framework upon which the male psyche is constructed.


6 Tips to Protect Your Child from Bullying

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Thursday, November 03, 2016

October 10, 2016
by Ronald Warren www.sixseeds.patheos.com


Bullying is something many children will encounter in some form. It can be name-calling, being picked upon or worse. And, nowadays it can happen in person or online. There is a temptation, especially for dads, to say, “what’s the big deal” or “isn’t this just innocent kid’s stuff?” But the fact is that all forms of bullying are abusive and can leave a painful legacy that can affect children even into adulthood. And, of particular note, dads have a unique and important role to play in helping their kids deal with bullies. Indeed, the social science data shows that children with involved dads are more likely to exhibit pro-social behavior, like proper impulse control and good conflict resolution skills and, thereby, are less likely to bully or be the target of bullies.

So if your kid is being bullied, here are some things to consider:

  • Get Involved…Early—As soon as your children begin to interact with others, you need to begin to teach them not to bully and how to protect themselves from bullies. Remember, children generally do not learn to solve these kinds of problems by themselves. Parents need to teach them.
  • Bullies need love too.—Despite your frustration or even anger when you learn that your child is being bullied, you must remember that the bully is a kid too. Moreover, bullies are very often children who have been bullied or abused themselves. They may be experiencing a life situation that they can’t handle and that leaves them feeling helpless and out of control. Bullying may just be a release for them. Since they can’t control their life, they want to control your child.
  • Bullies don’t grow on trees.—They usually have parents and in many cases their parents don’t know that their child is the class bully. Accordingly, it’s generally a good strategy to get them involved. Remember, however, that they will probably be defensive at first, so don’t lose your cool and make the matter worse. The goal is to create a safe environment for your child.
  • Just the facts, Ma’am.—It’s important that you be a “Detective Joe Friday” and get as much information as you can from your child before you take action. Avoid blaming anyone including your child or even, the bully. Also, make sure that you consider your child’s behavior, conflict management skills and temperament. The solution to this problem may entail some changes for both your child and the bully.
  • Remember, life is a stage.—One of things that my son found most helpful was role playing how he could respond to the bully. He was a bit nervous at first but once he got comfortable, it gave him a renewed sense of confidence. So, I strongly recommend that you actually walk through the situations and have your child practice different responses.
  • Get additional help if needed.—Like your child, you are not alone in handling this situation. Teachers, school administrators, counselor and pastors can be great resources. In addition, you can visit www.safechild.org.

Holiday Parenting Time

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Monday, December 22, 2014

Christmas is around the corner which means vacation time for children.  The unanswered questions are, where will they go? Who will they be with? For children spending time with their parents during this time is very special, there are so many memories that will last a lifetime. Holiday Parenting Time with your children is something you should always look forward to, whether you have a custody/visitation court order or not, all non-custodial parent have the right to visitation time with their children.  If you have a court order with the custodial parent, it’s very important to implement it at all time but especially during the holidays. However, with a court order parents are in a better place so not to cause any arguments or misunderstanding.

 Building strong family value and lasting memories and doing what’s in the best interest of your children in the coming year should be part of your New Year’s resolution.  This will make a difference between being a Father and a Dad.  Regular contact with your children will build strong leaders, strengthen family values and better fatherhood.  Enjoy your Holiday and your children.

In many states the court holiday schedule is as follow, whereas both parents will enjoy alternating holiday in the odd and even year. 


Holidays:

Mother or Father shall have the child on the holidays in Column 1 in odd-numbered years and the holidays in Column 2 in the even-numbered years. Father or Mother shall have the child on the holidays in Column 1 in the even-numbered years and the holidays in Column 2 in odd-numbered years:

Column 1

Column 2

Easter
Fourth of July
Halloween
Christmas Day

Memorial Day
Labor Day
Thanksgiving Day
Christmas Eve

With the exception of Christmas and Halloween contact, holiday contact shall be from 9 a.m. until 6 p.m. the day of the holiday.  Halloween contact shall begin at 5 p.m. and end at 8 p.m. on Halloween.  Christmas Eve contact shall begin at 6 p.m. on December 24th and end at noon on December 25th.  Christmas Day contact shall begin at noon on December 25th and end at 6 p.m. on December 26th.

 

 

By: Ajawavi Ajavon

DAB Mediation Consultant, LLC

Helping Fathers be better Dads

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Tuesday, October 21, 2014

 Helping Fathers be better Dads

 

The summit was a wonderful endeavor to engage fathers in the community on the importance of fatherhood. The messages received from all the speakers and workshop presenters were the same “helping Fathers be better Dads”. I am very hopeful that all who attended the summit also received that message. As the famous African proverb goes “it takes a village to raise a child” I came from the summit saying “it takes a village to help Fathers be better Dads”, that’s what Delaware Fatherhood Family Coalition accomplished over the weekend.

There are several things, as a village, which we can do in Helping Fathers be better Dads. First, we need to praise Fathers whenever appropriate. When a father handle a situation well with their children, let him know and be specific when he does it right. Second, support fathers in front of their children. Never disrespect a father in front of their children. It is not only embarrassing but it will also make him defensive. Third, encourage fathers to be a man, children need both father and mother influence in their life. It is very important to understand and value the different influences it have on the children. Most importantly, we need to give fathers their space. It’s agreeable that fathers and mothers both love their children, however they show it in a different way. Give fathers a little room to be adventurous with their children and to teach them in their own unique way. Value the differences and understand that children need their fatherly influences of be a well-rounded child.

So readers, the key to “Helping Fathers be better Dads” are to praise him, support him, encourage him and give him his Space.

Parenting with a Purpose II

Delaware Fatherhood and Family Coalition - Thursday, September 18, 2014

 

Parenting successfully is only possible for parents who are committed to parenting with a purpose. Unfortunately, there are many things which affect our children and as parents, we do not have control over them. Oftentimes, our children exhibit behaviors that are not addressed and they become adults who take the path of destruction. It is very crucial that parents work diligently to raise their children to do what is right from infancy. Incidentally, it is impossible for our children to avoid wrong doing and chose what is right without knowing one from another. Importantly, a Parent must provide a safe environment and develop a role model and goals for their children. A Parent who has control on who influence their children has the ability to limit outside influences on them. Parenting with a Purpose allow parents to supervise their children as they train them to do what is right. Parents are encouraged to ensure that what is being implemented is beneficial to their children. As parents we train our children to seek forgiveness when wrong, doing choices in and around their environment, proper manners during meal time and constructive and healthy paly with peers and siblings. Parenting with a Purpose is very important to promote positive, healthy and mature movement into adulthood for our children. In conclusion, in order to parent successfully we must Parent with a Purpose.


About DFFC

The Delaware Fatherhood & Family Coalition is an extension of the Promoting Safe and Stable Families Program and the Responsible Fatherhood Initiative created specifically to give a voice to fathers and the importance of their involvement for the well-being of their children.


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